Ada apa ngan pandangan perempuan² di luar sana tentang perlakuan2 antara lelaki kacak dgn lelaki yg hodoh tak kacak.. betol ke perempuan² memiliki pandangan seperti di bawah??? Credited to Koleksi Lawak Azrul.Biz

Kalau lelaki kacak pendiam
Perempuan akan cakap: Wow, cool giler.
Kalau lelaki tak kacak pendiam
Perempuan akan cakap: Eh perasan bagus.

Kalau lelaki kacak berbuat jahat
Perempuan akan kata:Nobody’s perfect.
Kalau lelaki tak kacak berbuat jahat
Perempuan akan cakap:Patutpun, muka pun macam pecah rumah!

Kalau lelaki kacak menolong perempuan yg diganggu
Perempuan akan cakap: Wah! Machonya, macam hero filem!
Kalau lelaki tak kacak menolong perempuan yang diganggu
Perempuan akan kata: Entah2 kawan dia.

Kalau lelaki kacak dapat perempuan cantik
Perempuan akan kata: Sepadan sangat.
Kalau lelaki tak kacak dapat perempuan cantik
Perempuan akan kata: Mesti kena bomoh perempuan tu!

Kalau lelaki kacak ditinggal kekasih
Perempuan akan kata: Jangan sedih, kan saya ada
Kalau lelaki tak kacak ditinggal kekasih
Perempuan akan kata: (terdiam, tapi telunjuknya meliuk-liuk dari atas ke bawah, patutlah, tengok saja luarannya)

Kalau lelaki kacak penyayang binatang
Perempuan akan cakap: Perasaannya halus. Penuh kasih sayang.
Kalau lelaki tak kacak penyayang binatang
Perempuan akan cakap: Sesama keluarga memang harus menyayangi.

Kalau lelaki kacak bawa BMW
Perempuan akan cakap: Matching. Hebat luar dalam.
Kalau lelaki tak kacak bawa BMW
Perempuan akan cakap: Bang, bosnya mana?

Kalau lelaki kacak tak mahu bergambar
Perempuan akan cakap: Pasti takut kalau-kalau gambarnya tersebar
Kalau lelaki tak kacak tak mau bergambar
Perempuan akan kata: Tak sanggup tengok hasilnya ye?

Kalau lelaki kacak menuang air ke gelas perempuan
Perempuan akan cakap: Ini barulah lelaki gentlemen.
Kalau lelaki tak kacak menuang air ke gelas perempuan
Perempuan akan cakap: Naluri pembantu, memang begitu.

Kalau lelaki kacak bersedih hati
Perempuan akan cakap: Let me be your shoulder to cry on.
Kalau lelaki tak kacak bersedih hati
Perempuan akan kata: Kuat nangis!! Lelaki ke bukan ni?

MENTAL HOSPITAL PHONE MENU

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital.

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won’t be crazy forever.

This coming week is National Mental Health Care week. You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care.

(Well, my job is done …..Your turn!)